You Don’T Need To Be A Pastor To Make A Difference

By Jeremy Kuehn | November 21, 2024

What do you do when someone is in crisis and seeking answers, support, or help?

For many, the default response is to refer them to someone else—perhaps a pastor, counselor, or trusted professional. Or maybe you listen and, in an effort to show empathy, commiserate with them. One story I heard recently made me think deeply: someone faced with a friend’s crisis said, “I need a pastor.” But here’s the truth: as a follower of Christ, you are equipped to handle moments like these—especially if you've been trained for ministry by a pastor or mentor.

Let’s take a moment to prepare ourselves for those times when a friend, coworker, or family member hits a crisis and turns to you as their lifeline. Here’s a clear, actionable framework to guide you.


1. Ask: Understand Their Situation

The first step is to listen attentively and ask thoughtful questions.

  • Start with empathy. Genuinely inquire about what is happening in their life. You might ask questions like, “Can you help me understand what’s going on?” or “What has been the most challenging part of this for you?”
  • Avoid pressing for details they’re uncomfortable sharing. If they’re not ready to open up fully, respect their boundaries. Your goal is to understand enough of their situation to offer meaningful support.
  • Practice active listening. Let them know they’re heard by reflecting back what they share: “It sounds like you’re feeling overwhelmed because of ___.” This simple acknowledgment can help them feel less alone.

Until you understand their situation, you won’t know how to help them effectively.


2. Scripture: Turn to God’s Word

No matter their situation, Scripture must be at the center of your response.

  • Relevance matters. If someone is grieving, sharing John 3:16 might not address their immediate pain. Instead, consider verses like Psalm 34:18 (“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted”) or 2 Corinthians 1:3-4, which speaks of God as the “Father of compassion.”
  • Admit when you don’t know. If you’re unsure of a scripture that applies to their situation, don’t pretend to have all the answers. Instead, say, “Let’s explore God’s Word together.” Open your Bible or use a Bible app to search for passages relevant to their struggles.
  • Be prepared. Make studying Scripture a daily discipline so you’ll be equipped when moments like these arise. As Paul instructs in 2 Timothy 2:15, we should “study to show ourselves approved,” rightly handling the Word of Truth.

3. Apply: Make Scripture Practical

Scripture is powerful, but its power is amplified when paired with practical application.

  • Bridge the gap. After reading a passage together, ask, “What does this scripture mean for your situation?” Discuss how they can apply God’s promises, commands, or wisdom in their specific context.
  • Provide examples. For instance, if someone is struggling with anxiety over finances, you might point to Matthew 6:25-34, where Jesus teaches us not to worry, and discuss practical steps like trusting God’s provision while creating a financial plan.
  • Encourage action. Application often requires small, tangible steps. Brainstorm ways they can align their choices with God’s Word.

4. Pray: Invite God Into the Situation

No conversation about a crisis is complete without prayer.

  • Pray together. Before you part ways, pray with them about their situation. This is crucial—it shows that you’re placing the issue in God’s hands and seeking His guidance and peace.
  • Be specific. Pray directly about their struggles, referencing the scriptures you discussed. For example, “Lord, we thank You that Your Word promises You will never leave or forsake us (Hebrews 13:5). We trust You to provide for ___ in this season of financial need.”
  • Follow up. Continue to pray for them after your meeting and check in with them regularly. A simple text like, “I’m praying for you today—how are things going?” can mean the world.

Final Thoughts

When someone turns to you in crisis, it’s not because they expect you to have all the answers—it’s because they trust you. As followers of Christ, we are called to bear one another’s burdens (Galatians 6:2) and offer hope rooted in God’s Word. By asking, turning to Scripture, applying its truth, and praying faithfully, you can be a source of light in their darkest moments.

So the next time you’re someone’s lifeline, don’t hesitate. Step into the moment, lean on God’s wisdom, and let Him use you to bring comfort, guidance, and hope.